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Worth Reading: “The Poets Caught by Giant Despair”

So much to write, so little time.

Which makes this bit of reading–an interview between poets Gillian Wigmore and Ariel Gordon–relevant and comforting. It’s worth reading the whole interview, of course, which you can do here. But if you need the highlights version, read on:

“… I have a partner, a job, a house, two healthy kids, but I do take note of the fact that this pace is unsustainable and the whole thing runs solely on our commitment to keeping everyone alive and tamping down any simmering resentment. Where writing fits into this is easy: it doesn’t. Every writing moment I have is stolen. What would my writing be like if I could devote myself to it? It’s not worth considering. I do the absolute best I can with what I’ve got. I tell myself I’m sparing my male peers from my genius by working with a handicap – it makes me feel better.

But let me say, too: I’m an ambitious female poet. With kids. I’m going to do this whether or not I have time or the Canada Council supports me; whether or not the boys get the breaks; whether or not the toilets need cleaning; I’ve got shit to do and I’m going to do it. Do I have a level of fury simmering under the surface? Maybe, but it fuels my work; it makes me efficient and honest and humble. When there is time to sit and focus, sometimes a poem comes out almost fully formed because I have been hatching it the whole time a child has been telling me the plot of his favourite episode of Myth Busters (with the EXPLOSIONS, mum! Mum? are you listening?), or I burned the soup because I was reading up on jeweled top snails. I admit my scattered brain, at the time or in the acknowledgements of my books, and I’ll keep going as long as I can manage it.”

“… I feel like I hustle hard all the time. And I sometimes I wonder how good it is for me and for my family, knowing that all of it is self-imposed. And then I remember how joyful writing – engaged first draft writing – is for me. I remember what it feels like to be part of a community of writers, to be a working writer. And the rest of it is redeemed, at least for a while.”


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